“Here,” the assassin said as he threw a bound Xeik in front of Lady Angela. “Deal with this worthless trash.” It had been a long time since Lewis had been so cold. He looked upon Xeik as he would anyone he deemed beneath him. His gaze lingered on the younger man, and then looked to Angela. “He went to see Lady Sirona, thinking it would heal the hole in his heart. It didn’t.” Lewis huffed. “And now he still seeks to fill the void in his heart. This time, he sought more than any drug or vice. This time he sought death…”

The broken Xeik didn’t stir as he lay there, his eyes dead. He didn’t try to argue. It was true. Xeik had come before Lewis, not to try and argue or change his view, but instead asked for a contract. One on himself, for whatever it cost. And this had been the result.

Lewis knelt down, and cut the ties on Xeik, and stood back up. “My weapons and skills would be wasted on you. You’re below the scum that I kill regularly. You’re not worth it…” He took one last look at the man he used to revere, and shook his head. “You’ve fallen so far…”

“I apologize, Lady Angela…” he said as he walked back towards the prism beach. “But I figured you’d have a use for a washed up thief. If you don’t, you could always just toss him in the ocean for feed…”

Xeik hadn’t moved. There wasn’t much else he could do. He felt hollow. Drugs had not filled the void before, and it had taken a lot of love and consideration to get him away from it. He was tempted to go back, but no…death was a much more preferable solution. But even that had been denied to him.

“Another goddess,” he muttered. “What good have any of you done…”

Angela was in the clinic with a particularly bored expression on her face. Her hair had been pulled back and she was wearing a coat of sorts to keep chemicals off of her. She rested her elbow against her crossed legs and held her chin on her palm. “Death huh?” Her words were steady as she pulled herself up. It wasn’t often that Angela wasn’t in prime and proper condition. Today she had been researching and it showed from her outfit. She looked much more like a doctor than any other time that Lewis had seen her. “That’s Serafina’s territory.” It came off as sarcastic but still, she watched as the assassin freed Xeik.

“Washed-up individuals are my specialty it seems.” She watched as Lewis walked away before she knelt on the ground next to Xeik. She heard his words and she mulled it over.

“In my honest opinion? Not much of anything.” She held that bored expression. “This isn’t the life I wanted. I never wanted to be a goddess or be in charge of anyone but if not me then who? I can control what I do or don’t do. For the record, I am the one who talked to Sirona after what she did. Evil and good are not things that can be measured in things like black and white Xeik.”

She knew his name from Lewis’s thoughts and the small talks she had with Simone. “However, if you think that you can solve something by killing yourself you shouldn’t have asked Lewis to shoulder that burden. The fact that he brought you to me means that Lewis cares. He wouldn’t have bothered if he didn’t and that means he thinks you have something to live for Xeik.”

She let the door to the clinic close so it was just her and Xeik. “In my time as a goddess, I have watched many of my friends and family die. I have had empires use my time in the conclave to kill my family and my people. I have lost much. It is often not what gods and goddesses can do for you. It is not us who impact the greater future of the world. It is people like you Xeik. While we are powerful we are not many. We call people to arms because of this. I can sow the seeds of healing, I can sow the seeds of childbirth, and I can sow the seeds of love. However, if one doesn’t grasp it then they won’t see the gift before them. Look at Lewis and Simone. I brought her back. I made her what she is because Lewis asked me to. I opened the way but only he could make it prosper. It’s the same thing with gods and mortals. Whether or not Sirona’s actions have caused great calamity isn’t what I’m answering. The good I have to offer isn’t something that you are going to just obtain from me. You must work for it. Otherwise, everyone will have died for nothing and that is actually the greatest loss of all.”

Xeik stirred, if slight at Lady Angela’s words. He looked at her with his dead eyes, and scoffed. “And what can I do. What can one, washed up thief and recovered addict do? It’s taken everything I have just to survive since I lost it all, and now…” He pushed himself up into a sitting position, and shook his head.

“Why…why did you help Lewis? You’re a goddess of Life, and he’s a dealer of death. He’s nothing more than a crazed assassin…It’s a miracle he can take care of those kids as it is.” His words rang for a moment. “He has power…the power to protect them. To kill anyone in his way. But that’s…that’s not right.” Xeik was still so close to finding an answer, but so far. “Why can’t we find a better solution? Isn’t there a better way than wasting the life that was given to them?”

Not that he had much room to talk. He had wasted a portion of his own when he tried to drown his sorrows. “Death can’t be the answer. I just…I’m just not strong enough, or smart enough to find a better way. That’s it…” He looked to Lady Angela. “Isn’t that something you can show me? A way to protect life?”

Angela rolled her eyes back and forth as the thief asked her his question. “What can one do? Even when one has nothing? Give yourself? That is a noble cause but it is a foolish one. Sometimes in order for you to help the world, you have to save yourself first. A recovered addict could save others from following his path for example. The weak aren’t survivors Xeik and despite how Lewis sounded, he was lying to you with his words. His heart said other things but he said the things he knew you would believe or what he thinks he believes. He is an odd one.”

Falling back into her chair she waited for Xeik to be done completely before answering. “Because you are wrong on a few points Xeik. First and foremost, not all things can be solved by being a pacifist. Peace-making is never going to work all the time. Sometimes in order to change destiny, we must kill.” Her eyes narrowed down on him. “I’ve held the mantle of death. When I killed my husband and my child when I ascended as a god. I was filled with anger at myself for not being able to do more. I was a goddess why couldn’t I save them? Why did I feel so powerless? It’s because Xeik, no matter how hard we try we can’t save everyone. I told you that good and evil are not black and white. However, we can’t achieve looking at things in shades of gray until we are ready. It is so much simpler to just label things or people like Lewis as evil.”

She relaxed a bit more as she grabbed a cup of tea and sipped on it. “Do you want one?” She motioned to a cup just for him that hadn’t been there just before. “Death.” She continued as she took another sip, “Is the answer in situations where we can’t win. Life isn’t wasted but recycled and sometimes life is created from something else. We can’t just create life from nothing. So in death, that life isn’t lost. Sometimes souls are so bad that we lock them away, however, life is always recycled in some way. They will never be the people that we care about again but they are alive again. Eventually.”

There was a sigh from her lips, “I helped him because he had the same look in his eyes that you do right now. He was broken. He had lost the only one he cared about. Xeik, he started the orphanage because of what you said. YOU changed him. Like I said it isn’t black and white. Lewis isn’t evil so much as misguided and I gave him a compass in Simone. Simone has killed many more people than Lewis ever has whether she remembers it or not. When I judged her soul I chose the route that she had been made into that person. That if Simone had been left in her castle that she would have remained innocent. The monster she became was someone else’s fault. Those who steal innocence are the great evil in the world Xeik. The monsters born of stolen innocence are worse than those born into being one.”

She leaned back in her chair and looked at the ceiling. “A goddess of life I may be but I’m no fool. You can’t save everyone, not everyone is worth keeping alive, and holding it as a burden on you is selfish. You must be able to accept that you can’t to be able to save those you can. If you try to save everyone you kill people that you could have saved. We have to be able to step away and see it objectively. I’m married to the Dark Kaiser. A man who is known for his evil deeds but I don’t see his deeds being him. He loves me and he does what he has to, to save his family. The worlds we are born in are different and that’s where looking at things differently comes in. I will not ask Nemesis not to kill because for his world that can never happen. Just like he will never ask me to stop saving people I can. He might question my decisions but he will never tell me what to do.”

She tapped her finger on her nose, “Another thing you are actually overlooking is that you think Lewis is crazed. He isn’t. He’s grown a lot. He’s still growing. The question is what sort of growth can you do Xeik?”

Xeik heard her words, and it was a lot to take in. It was something he had always struggled with, trying to reconcile the world into black and white. And Lady Angela was right, the world rarely, if ever working in that aspect. It was something that he had always tried to deny, as if he could force the world into two separate factions…justify anything. It was impossible, though, and with a Goddess blatantly telling him how it was, it was hard to ignore.

“I…” He paused. The cycle and renewal of life. The fact that sometimes death was the only answer. That Lewis had changed, and was growing. It was a lot to process, and it hurt to even think about. But there was the tiniest of a sparkle in his eyes. Growth. Teaching others. The desire to help was there.

“But I don’t have the power to back it up,” Xeik said finally. “Lewis does. The strength he has…I hate to admit it, but it’s impressive. And he had a God backing him. That’s a power that I can’t hope to even compete with.” He held up his hands. “Not that I want to compete, though….that’s not…what I meant…”

The tea was welcome, and he took it, letting the warmth of the cup radiate into his hands. After a moment more, he took a sip. “It’s delicious…” The warm drink definitely did something to improve his mood.

“Lewis has changed a lot, hasn’t he?” Xeik looked into the cup. “I couldn’t believe it at first. When I recruited him, he was this scrawny kid who looked like a gust of wind could knock him over. And here now…” The young man huffed. “Here I am, looking on in awe as he springs forward, while I’m left here.” He looked up to Lady Angela. “What is it that I can do now? You said I need to grow…where do I even start?”

The goddess could see that spark ignite and she smirked a little. Finally, she had said something that fully caught his attention. If he was willing to listen he was willing to learn. “No one is powerless Xeik. You have to look at what your strengths are and go from there. Power doesn’t always win battles sometimes negotiators can win before blood is shed.”

She drained the cup fully and thought more, “It’s made with lavender. Helps to soothe the soul. My own blend.”

Thinking once more on the assassin Angela hummed to herself, “Yeah, well he didn’t look much better the first time he showed up. Threatening Simone. Yelling at Simone. Goodness he was mean to that girl. But, whatever it was that Simone did to him in her mind, he came out with growth. He loved that girl. When he killed her, he did it because he thought it was what she wanted. The greatest gift of love he could show her was to give her the freedom she wanted. It would have been evil to keep her where she didn’t want to be. However, the two of them sucked at communication. Simone thought she was a burden on him and so she wanted to die. Lewis wanted to keep her around but didn’t want to cage her. I smacked the both of them. Well, I punched Lewis in the face.”

Standing up she offered her hand to Xeik, “Stay here with me and grow. Staying here is step one. Expanding your talents is step two. What you do beyond that. How you progress is ultimately up to you. Lewis once told me that you were sort of good with potions. By telling me I invaded his privacy. I could teach you more about that. I am an alchemist, a healer, and above all else, I can work a variety of miracles. The people here in my temple? Some of them are refugees.”

There was one more thing as she pulled Xeik up, “One more thing… I constantly have to go see what Simone is doing to make sure that she is well. It’s not that I don’t think I am a genius, because I am but in case I ever die I want to make sure she stays alive. Xeik is Simone dies so does Lewis. They are one in the same now. So, you might have to deal with the fact that Lewis might scoff at you. I would like you to go with me though so you see how he’s grown. It might inspire you and change your mind.”

“Lavender, huh?” he mused as he took another few sips, listening to Lady Angela as she spoke of Lewis. It came to no shock that the assassin had treated Simone the way he did, but the way that Angela spoke of him and his changes, about how he killed her out of kindness, out of good was something that he struggled with. The Goddess of Life and Love herself was speaking it though, so it must have been true. She had no reason to lie to him about this.

Death can be good…life can be bad… It was a simple thought. A very simple one. Probably one that could be taught to a child, and yet here Xeik was just now trying to comprehend it.

“Wait, you punched Lewis?” Xeik asked with a true smile across his face. “That must have been something. I’d pay anything to have seen the look on his face after that…” He realized that his cheeks were hurting from the smile, and he looked back down, letting the smile fade. There was still a hint of a smile still there, though…

Xeik listened as she offered a place to stay, a place to grow and learn. He thought for a moment, and took her hand. “I’ll…I’ll stay, but…” He glanced down. “There’s work I can do to help here…I can start here.” He smiled. “I can handle that. Small steps, right?”

He paused at the one more thing, though. “Simone?” He flushed. “Lady Angela, I don’t know if you’re aware but…I can change into a woman at times. I would rather…stay in that form around Lewis and Simone if possible, as to not let them know I’m there…is that…something I can do?”

“He came in here drunk off his ass screaming at me to go fuck myself. Then had the audacity to ask for his emotions to die then he asked me to bring her back. First, I don’t like drunks. Second, don’t wake me up from sleep. Third, if he had just talked with Simone… Men.” She rolled her eyes. “And Simone for that matter. She hadn’t noticed how much he had grown either.”

“Small steps is all that I ask for. That and I might ask you to help Raine and that should be punishment enough for Lewis dropping you on my doorstep.” There was a motherly smile on her face before she frowned. “I know all about Aaya and no. Part of growing is going to be dealing with Lewis. So no, you are not permitted to use Aaya when around them. That means at Raile’s too.”

She took his arm and dragged him with her, “Alright, so first thing is first. You need to meet Raine. She is my avatar and… she is a bit of a bird brain. She is a phoenix and she is very innocent. I want you to make sure that she stays out of trouble if I have you working with her. Her office is over this way,” Angela took him down a hallway as she knocked on a door.

“DON’T OPEN THE DOOR PLEASE,” a cute voice came from inside.

“Why not?” Angela quirked an eyebrow. “Raine, what did you do?” She swung the door open and bubbles flooded from outside the door hitting both her and Xeik even moving them back a bit. Angela had the most unamused look on her face. “Raine, what is going on?”

“I… found bubbles!” Raine got excited as she came out all soaked. “I made them! WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME I COULD MAKE SUCH WONDERFUL THINGS?!”

“Because you would do this…”

“OH!” Raine looked around. “I MADE A MESS!” She looked at Xeik and waved.

“Raine… This is Xeik. He’s going to be living with us for a while. He will be helping you out from time to time… How much of your office is ruined?!” Angela went to storm past her but Raine blocked her.

“IT’S NOT RUINED IT’S TAKING A BATH! TELL HER XEIK. SAVE ME!”

At the mention of being banned from becoming Ayaa around Lewis and Simone, the young man frowned. “I’ll…try…” He looked away, but before he could try anything else, he was dragged along by Lady Angela to meet Raine, her avatar. Much to his dismay, Raine was not what he expected an avatar to be. As the door opened, bubbles came flooding out of the room, followed by the innocent sounding Raine.

She was anything but innocent, and as she tried to justify her actions, Xeik found himself staring in horror at the soaked office. “This is crazy…” He looked at both Angela and Raine, and sighed. He walked into the office behind Lady Angela, and looked around. “Well…I…guess I should…grab a mop….” The young thief sighed, and crossed his arms.

“Raine…can you please go grab a mop and cleaning supplies?” He gave her a smile. “We can finish giving your office a bath, and then we can talk…right?” He turned his attention back to the office. “And…while she’s gone…figure out what is salvageable from this.” The thief sighed. “A den of thieves might be easier than dealing with Raine….”

“Good, it will help you become more assertive I think. If you have a position in life you should try to be as brave as possible.” She patted him on the head.

Raine was adorable and small compared to Angela. She didn’t look much older than Xeik for that matter. She had long pink hair and was dressed cutely. Though for the moment she was covered in suds. “OKAY!” Raine got excited and ran out of the room. Soon she peeked around the corner. “What’s… a mop?”

“Raine, just go back Anemone to help you find one,” Angela snapped a bit and sighed as Raine ran away. “Honestly, that child,” Angela rubbed her face and looked around. “Oh, but she saved her stash.” She pointed at a large chest that was covered in a magic bubble. “She is so grounded from all fun things.”

Angela sighed a bit as Raine came back in with a mop and offered it to Xeik. “HEY, MY GOODS!”

“Not yours. You thieved them.”

“THEY WOULDN’T MISS THEM!” Raine shouted as she ran over to the chest and opened it. Inside were very shiny objects worth very little.

“…Is that Elijah’s quill he’s been bitching about?”

“…yes? It’s made from gold,” Raine said as she got it out and showed Xeik. “It’s shiny. See?”

“You need to give that back. He said his father gave it to him.”

“But Elijah is always so mean to me,” Raine puffed her face up.

Angela rubbed her face again, “Raine can you go make sure all the children are alright?” Raine got the hint and ran out of the room. “See what I mean? She’s a trouble maker. She is a good girl for the most part though. Let’s see what we can save in this room though… It’s a good start for your tasks here.”