Dear Journal, Rielle has given me a journal so that I may record what has happened in my life and a way to explore my emotions. I don't really see the point in this. Especially since I won't let anybody else see the writing. But she is my mentor so I suppose she knows what she is doing. Today I woke up in a small cabin. Normally I awaken in an inn of some sort but since I am training with Rielle she has offered to let me stay in her home. The nicest thing about the cabin is the fact that there aren’t any nosy neighbors and nobody is trying to convince me to buy alcohol. Unlike every single inn I’d ever been to. I wake up at dawn and that’s usually when my training begins. However I’m not waking up this early to begin fighting. It isn’t as easy as it was back at guard training. Instead of regular warm ups to start out with we must go on a hike through the cold winds and land. Then we have to sit out in the snow and meditate. After a session of meditation, we head back to the cabin. Once we are warmed up, we stretch. Then I have to do some pushups and then my warm up is over. Back at home our warm ups would have consisted of stretching then straight to the fighting. Of course this is one on one training while the guards had to train a lot of teens and adults. The guards needed to train as fast as they could while also teaching discipline to a bunch of wild children. So their training would be a little more basic. I don’t mind the stretching or the pushups. I just don’t understand the meditation part. Why is it necessary? I don’t dislike doing the hike but I just don’t understand why it is necessary to meditate. All we do is sit there and do nothing. It serves no purpose. However Rielle’s rules were to complete the training without complaint. So that’s what I’ll do. But she never said I couldn’t complain about it in my journal. Besides Rielle explained that the journal was meant for me. She wasn’t going to critique it or even look at it. The journal was part of my training but it was a part that I needed to complete without somebody looking over my shoulder or checking it. Or at least that’s what she explained to me. This means I can write whatever I like and Rielle can’t do anything about it! Otherwise I’ll know she has read it and has contradicted herself. Either way I win. After warm ups is when we get to hand to hand combat. This I understand a lot more than the meditation. I already knew that I wasn’t always going to have a sword with me to defend myself. In fact a lot of warriors apparently died due to being unable to take an opponent without a weapon. Or at least that’s what Rielle said. I believe her completely. She’s the type of person who had been in battle before. Not just as a wandering warrior but also as a soldier. Rielle keeps her door locked and never lets me see what is inside her room. But there was one time when I had a question for her later in the evening. I thought she had been in her room since the door was unlocked. I pushed the door open only a little before I heard Rielle ask me what I was doing. I explained I was looking for her and she directed me back to the main room so I could ask her a question. But in that moment where I had opened the door I saw half of a suit of armor. Not just any armor but the type of soldier armor I had seen at home. The armor was scratched up and damaged. Which made me wonder what kind of battles she had been in. Perhaps I’ll ask someday. Once hand to hand combat is over then we move on to stances and moving around while fighting. This we do outside. It is cold but Rielle had explained that my opponents wouldn’t choose a day with perfect temperature to fight me. They’ll just fight with me whatever weather so I would have to deal. I hadn’t been complaining but I think the expression on my face summed up what I was thinking. I’m trying to adjust without a complaint but this is my first day with her real training. Before she had me just cleaning and lifting heavy things. Now it was real and completely different from what I expected. And though I might complain a bit I actually do enjoy the training. Rielle is a good teacher and she always explains or shows why we do certain things. She is understanding and kind although she can be a little strict at times. At times it seems that she plans out everything and designs it in a way that I’ll learn best from. Which I really appreciate. I know this because after training is over she starts planning out the next training session. I’m glad she’s my teacher. Although I’ll never admit it or she would start teasing me about going soft. The stances part of the session was a little difficult since I was slipping and sliding over the snow. Rielle showed me that if I bended my knees more, it would be easier to balance. This made it a bit easier but I still ended up falling alot. I didn’t really get physically hurt but I ended up getting more frustrated at the snow. Somehow I managed through this part and then Rielle called a break. We went inside and warmed up by the fire. I had some soup and some bread then Rielle handed me a book. The book held information about Egjora. It was a small book but had contained much information about the land. I only got to read the first chapter though. Still it was fascinating to read all about Egjora. I had the basic education in what the lands outside Adeluna were but I’d never been able to go into detail. The first chapter explained how the city of Egjora came to be. Apparently the ancestors of a select few of merchants had created the city centuries ago. Now these families ruled over Egjora with Gyndnegle as the head family. But from what the book explained about the city though it was clear that the bank was the true power of Egjora and the wealthy ruled the lower classes with an iron fist. Then I finished the chapter and asked Rielle about it. Rielle explained that the author was a man who had once been part of the upper class but had fallen out of favor. As a result he ended up with the middle class and was able to see the way that the people were treated better. He started writing this book secretly and spent the rest of his life working to make as many copies as he could. He had then sent all these copies out to not only to Egjora but the rest of Canelux. The author then disappeared shortly after the books went out. Rielle explained that he had probably been killed by an assassin or some hired thugs. But the merchants and the bank were unable to retrieve all the books. That was partially why Rielle lived in Itjivut away from cities. It was certainly a rough life and Rielle had to rely much on trade and magic to survive. But it was safer and you could actually be yourself. After the reading session we returned to training and finally I was able to use the sword. We started out with a broadsword and began to train. Of course we did this outside. I understood now why we had focused on stances and moving around in the snow. Although not perfect, I was able to hold my own thanks to the training we did earlier. I was quite experienced with swords myself since I had been training previously with guards for six years. The only thing that put me at a disadvantage was the snow. And the fact that I was still tired from this morning. Rielle was better at fighting in the snow and she was a little less worn than I. However she was older and naturally had less youth energy than I did. So it seemed equally match. At least it was until I slipped on the snow. Rielle helped me up then we continued fighting. After our sparring match she showed me some awesome new movements that she had found herself while traveling a long time ago. Eventually we wrapped up on our sword fighting and began on training in a different variety of weapons. After all there wasn’t a guarantee that a person would be given a perfect weapon for a fight. They had to use what was available.  I ended up training with daggers, how to fight with only a shield, fighting with a bo staff, a club, a hand axe, and a katana. I have learned how to fight with a bow, shield, and a hand axe during by training with the guards but I never focused on it as much as I focused on the sword. So logically I wasn’t as good with these three weapons but I did know the basics. As for the katana, club, and bo staff. I was terrible at fighting with it and completely inexperienced with these weapons. After finishing up with these new weapons our training session was over. I went back to the cabin, had dinner, then went to bed exhausted. I would have fallen asleep but Rielle reminded me that I had to write in this journal. So now I have finished writing in it. Yay. 

Dear Journal, 

Yesterday was tiring and as a result we ended up practicing magic with some educational studies. Magic was different from physical exercise since it seemed to use mana more than it used physical energy. Rielle must have chosen magic so we could give ourselves a break from physical training. I also ended up doing a lot of reading up on Egjora. Or at least as much as I could. There were few books that covered what was actually going on in Egjora. But I was able to pick up a few things. I learned more about Itjivut, the ice island, and the ice elves. The place was as fascinating as it was terrifying. I am relieved that I come from Adeluna and not from Egjora. Still I have to admit that Egjora’s city was impressive and Adeluna itself was by no means perfect. 
After reading up on Egjora, I practiced my languages. Yes, I was already fluent in them but it never hurt to practice. Soon I was done and we had some lunch. Then Rielle and I practiced a bit of magic. I already had a few spells but not too many. The strength and hunter spell were the only ones I have so far. I practiced performing those two spells then Riellle began teaching me the conjure food spell. It was one of the spells she had been using to keep herself fed. I failed massively at this spell. Even when we tried over and over, to no avail. It was such a pain! We moved on from magic and returned to reading. This time Rielle gave me a different kind of book. It was fiction. It had been a long time since I’d last read fictional stories. So I opened it and began to read. 
The story was about a warrior named Vadien. He had been traveling for a while and had found a beautiful little village. The village however was in a panic since all the elders had been missing from the village. They blamed the nearby mountain that had been smoking at the top. So Vadien promised to find the elders and defeat whatever evil lurked at the top of the mountain. The warrior was prepared for a fight when he arrived at the top only to discover that all the elders were at the top preparing some sort of magical spell. The elders explained that they had discovered that the mountain was not a mountain at all but a volcano. They all traveled to the mountain to try to put a spell on the mountain to stop it from erupting. But it seemed that all their spells were useless and they were starting to panic. Vadien sent the elders back to their homes promising that the village would not be harmed by the lava of the volcano. 
That’s when Vadien traveled down to the base of the volcano. He had a pickaxe and a shovel with him and began to dig a trench around the base of the volcano. His plan was to dig a trench that would direct the lava out to the nearby ocean instead of the village. When the villagers realized what Vadien was planning they mocked him or tried to get him to stop, all believing it was a foolish endeavor. All except a woman by the name of Irise. Irise picked up a shovel and began helping Vadien. She eventually managed to convince the rest of the village to join Vadien in digging of the trench. Together the digging of the trench went much faster and they were halfway done. But suddenly the lava began to erupt from the volcano and all the villagers retreated. All except Irise and Vadien who kept digging. Suddenly Vadien made Irise return back to her village. Irise was hesitant but decided to leave the trench and hope for the best. Vadien didn’t want anybody to get hurt by this. Apparently one of the gods was impressed by Vadien’s bravery and gave him amazing strength. Vadien was able to finish the trench using his sudden strength and speed. He was able to finish the trench and escaped the trench. The lava flowed into the trench and ended up in the ocean. Vadien had saved the village but gave the credit to the villagers for saving themselves. From then on Vadien was known as a hero. 
When I finished reading the story I realized that tears were dropping from my eyes. This story was familiar to me. My nurse, Rose had read this to me when I was a child. In that moment I had a sudden rush of memory of my dear nurse. She used to tell all kinds of myths to me when I was a child. I can remember it just like it was yesterday. My nurse always smelled like roses, so I often called her Rosy. The first time she told me that story was when I had fallen down onto the ground and as a result I had started crying. Rose saw this and reached out to me with such compassion and worry. I had reached back out to her and she wrapped her arms around me. I felt incredibly safe in her arms. It was one of the few things that was comforting to me when I was young. She then carried me up to my room and cleaned off the small scratch on my knee. Then Rose began to tell me a story about Vadien and the volcano. That had cheered me right up. 
Rose would always use stories to either teach me, to comfort me, or to distract me from the pain I felt. When my parents had forgotten my birthday or when my older sibling was forced to move with my mother to the court in Adeluna. Nobody else was there except for Rose and her wonderful stories. Stories that would fill my imagination and make the world seem so much brighter for me. She would tuck me into bed, hug me, hold me, give me comfort and love. More love than I had ever received before. Rose was my first mentor. She supported me in ways nobody else did and encouraged me to be whatever I wanted to be. Even if it was unrealistic that kind of attitude meant the world to me. I still remembered her last day at the manor. 
My tutor had decided that I was too old for a nurse and that Rose was doing nothing but filling my head with silly stories. The tutor asked my father to fire Rose and my father agreed. My father no doubt wanted more money for himself and by firing the one person who loved me, he would be able to save more gold for himself. When Rose came into my room to tell me the news I couldn’t understand. What did she mean she was leaving? I asked if I had done something wrong or bad to make her leave. Rose shook her head and explained to me that it was just that she wasn’t needed anymore. I protested furiously and ended up clinging onto Rose begging her not to leave. Screaming her name and crying out. One of the guards ended up having to rip me from her grasp and hold me back. I punched and flailed but they wouldn’t let me go. In one desperate cry I screamed at the top of my lungs.
“Don’t leave me!” I remember were my last words to her as she was forced out of the manor. 
When I was older I discovered the reason why Rose had been fired. The reason angered me and I grew to despise my father. At one point I even looked throughout town but wasn’t able to find Rose or even a trace of her. Now I was at Rielle’s cabin training to be a fighter. But that moment hadn’t ever left me. I had forgotten about it for a while but that kind of thing was something that you always remembered. Rielle must have noticed when I was busy reading that I wasn’t exactly happy and left the room to give me some space. Which I appreciated. I left to my room and calmed myself down. At dinner I came back out, feeling better, and had dinner with Rielle. During dinner we usually didn’t talk much, which I appreciated since it gave me time to think and I wouldn’t have to come up with small talk. Rielle didn’t ask or mention the book and my reaction to it. Thankfully. After dinner I went to bed early. Still sore from yesterday. Rielle had to remind me to write in my journey again. 

Dear Journal, 

It has been a long time since I have written in my journal. Rielle gave me permission to take a break on it since we have been incredibly busy. It's been a very long time since my last entry. Maybe a year or two ago? I can't remember how long its been. So I have a lot to make up. The first event I can remember is that when we were out training, we found a dog almost frozen in the snow. Rielle and I managed to pick up the dog and headed back home. Rielle took care of the creature for the rest of the day while I focused on stretching and inside practice. The next couple of days Rielle managed to keep the thing alive. She got upset when I didn't have concern for the animal. It was just an animal so I really don't understand the problem. If it lived then great. If it didn't, oh well. That's life. Rielle then lectured me for the rest of the evening about how important animals are. I understand they are important but that doesn't mean I need to care.  The next couple of days the dog became more active and friendly. Honestly I don't mind him much. He does have soft fur but he is also extremely slobbery. Rielle's been letting him into my room, despite me asking her to keep him out. Is this her form of revenge? Or is it some sort of odd test? Either way I will pretend not to notice. I won't give her the satisfaction of a response. Thank goodness she does not read my journals. 

I found a chapter in my book about the gods. Rielle explained that I needed to be careful about these types of books. They are human interpretations of the gods and not actually written by the gods themselves. Most likely there is some bias and lies inside the text. If only because humans and mortals in general don't know the truth of the matter. Nobody really knows what the gods are doing. I asked Rielle more about the gods to the point that she became annoyed. 


"Why don't you ask them yourself? I don't have time to keep answering these questions." Rielle whined. 


"I can't ask the gods these questions. They are gods! They wouldn't have time to answer them." I explained. 


"You'd be very surprised." Rielle said. 


Then she went and took a nap. I don't understand what Rielle meant by that but perhaps she knew something about the gods that I didn't. In all honesty this past month has been very strange. Rielle keeps looking at me in a strange way. As if there is something wrong but she won't say it. I dare not question her unless I want to deal with a cranky Rielle. Another thing I noticed is the fact that Rielle has been doing less physical activity recently. She's been slowing down more and being more careful about what she does. Maybe this is a side effect of getting older. Rielle has gotten cranky at something I said a while ago. I was describing what a hero was supposed to do. You know, save people and defeat villains. It's what heroes are supposed to do. However Rielle doesn't seem to think the same. She started explaining that there was a lot more to the job than just that. That I didn't just need to save a few people or stop the bad guy. There was apparently a lot more to do. Rielle didn't elaborate further. 

The past few days Rielle has been pushing me further than ever in both my physical and magical training. I am proud to say that I am better at combat than ever before and that I am somewhat decent in the ways of magic. In fact I knocked Rielle down during a sparring session three times. This may not seem like a lot but Rielle is a professional who knows what she is doing. And she only managed to knock me down two times in turn. With magic I have pulled off casting the toughest spell I have ever had. The polymorph spell. I turned myself into a rabbit and was able to transform myself back. I have never seen Rielle more proud in my entire life. She almost was smiling. Later in the day we were eating dinner and Rielle ordered me to go straight to bed. As if I was some sort of child! But I obeyed without complaint. Otherwise I would have to do extra duty in laundry tomorrow or get a lecture an hour long. 

The next morning I came to help with breakfast. Rielle already had breakfast ready but was refusing to speak to me. Sometimes she got like this so I didn't question it. There was once where she didn't speak for an entire week. The best option was to just act normally. I ate my breakfast then begun the morning meditation. Rielle didn't join me. That was a surprise. No matter what happened she always joined for meditation. After I was done, Rielle approached me with a letter. 

"I have an important task I want you to complete." Rielle said, "It will take you a long time to get it done so you will need to pack all of your things." 

"Ok. Did I do something to upset you?" I asked curiously.

"No. I am sending you on this task for your improvement." Rielle explained, "Consider this a test. The hardest test you will ever face in your entire life. It will change you. Hopefully for the better. And Jadira?"

"Yes?" I responded. 

"You will not be allowed to continue your training until you have completed this quest." Rielle said. 

Surprise could not even begin to describe the emotions that I felt when I heard that. Instead of displaying them on the world to see, I didn't say anything and instead left to my room to pack. It was better to leave that room than explode in a range of emotions right there. But the first and strongest emotion I felt was pure rage. I had been training so hard and working to the bone and yet my training is put on the line?! Did she just not want to train me anymore?! Was I a bad student?! She couldn't just stop when there was so much more I needed to learn! But she could. I packed up all of my stuff and left. At that moment I didn't even want to look at her. Maybe she was angry that I left without saying goodbye. At that moment I didn't care. I stomped through that snow and blizzard until I arrived at an Inn of some sort. There I bought myself a room then went to bed. It was only until the morning did I actually read that letter. 

After reading the letter all I could feel was immense amount of guilt. In the letter she had explained what the tasks were and why she gave me them. They were new challenges that I could not have gotten while training with her. There were seven tasks. First, I need to travel to five countries. Second, I need to find three things. Soapstone, a pearl, and a star sapphire. Third, I need to visit every deity's temple. Fourth, I need to do one kind deed for somebody, and that kind deed would not be forgotten by that person. Saving a person did not count for this task. Fifth, I need to protect somebody. Not just physically but also emotionally. Sixth, I need to befriend a wild animal. Seventh, I need to visit seven libraries and read seven books from each library. Every book I was supposed to read would need to be about culture, history, magic, religion, a journal, an art book, and most importantly a fictional book about heroes. 

My mentor did not just want to get rid of me, like so many others in my life. She merely wanted me to grow in new ways. Even if I don't understand the tasks, she still believed that they were important. Guilt hammered me down that night. She was one of the few people I had as a friend and a mentor. Instead of saying goodbye I just left without a word. Like a child. It reminded me that I still had so much more to learn. I would return and apologize but the letter she wrote explained that Rielle predicted that I would act in such a way and said to not come back until I have completed the tasks and that she had already forgiven me. So, I won't come back until the tasks have been completed. Until I have proven to myself and to her that I am worthy enough. Only then will I be able to reach the potential that Rielle sees in me. I am so sorry Rielle. If this journal ever gets back to you, and I have failed. Then I am so sorry about what I did. You are the best mentor a student could ask for. You are the best moth-…. Anyway I won't stop until these tasks have been completed. Even if it costs me everything, I will complete them. 

Dear Journal,


I decided to head to Ataiyo, Land of the Blue Sun first. That was the place where my mentor once lived so I decided to head there to see what it was like. And, by traveling there, I could check off a location off of my list. There were many more tasks to complete but at least I have one down. When I arrived at one of the villages to stay I noticed that they all seemed to be in a panic and I asked what was wrong. Apparently there had been this sort of monster bear that had started to destroy whatever laid in its path due to being woken up from a long sleep by some foolish children. This was the first real monster battle I have had. The other ones were always with my mentor and even then they were already weakened. While the monster was busy rampaging, I managed to sneak up on it from behind. Then I sliced at it with my broadsword. However the bear’s hide was far too strong for my measly sword. My fierce blow only left a small scratch. The bear in retaliation for the attack hit me with one of it’s claws and sent my flying. I slammed into some poor villager’s house then got back up. Luckily I was only bruised and scratched. It hurt like hell but the actual landing was not that bad. I realized that I was going to need to find it’s weak spot. Then I remembered something. Back home we had a dog that had a softer underbelly than the rest of his skin. It was worth a shot. I used a spell to weaken the monster and used another spell to strengthen myself. Then I moved quickly and stabbed my sword into his stomach. That of course, did not kill the monster but it made it harder for him to move around and attack as much. I dodged his next attack then sliced at his chest. This was enough to defeat the monster bear. After the battle, the villagers thanked me.


They offered to heal my wounds for free and I let them. It would have been rude to turn them down. I stayed there for two days then was ready to move on. Before I left they handed me a kimono and a mask as thank you gifts. The kimono obviously took a lot of effort to make and I appreciated the gift while feeling guilty at taking such a thing that I really did not deserve. Still I took it so as not to offend them. After that I headed onwards to the this bamboo forest area. I was told that I would need to be careful since it was easy to get lost in. So I could eventually get out, I took a long rope and tied it around a boulder. Then I headed into the forest with rope in hand. When I wanted to get out I would be able to by following that rope. My plan was going great until I fell into Kujishoku, the spirit realm. I slipped off the cliff and fell into that realm. My natural first instinct was to hide since there was no way to escape. The rope I had was still where I fell and had not fallen down with me. Apparently there was somebody else who fell down with me. I learned later her name was Shiloh. She used a plain mask and a cloak to disguise herself after three fey women dressed up in masks and kimonos passed. After watching her follow them, I decided to do her same trick and follow her. For all I knew she could have been a fey playing a trick on me. So I placed an invisibility spell on myself, put on the mask and kimono, then followed her.


After travelling for a short while, a black dog appeared in the distance behind us. It was an Okuri-inu, a dog like creature that would follow travelers until they reach their destination. However if the creature got too close then one would be devoured. I had heard about it in one of my nurse’s stories that she had told to me when I was young. As long as we kept on the road and kept moving, we would be fine. We eventually reached a fey town and the Okuri-inu left us alone. Still I kept my invisibility and disguise on in case of any problems. In case any fey decided they wanted to kill or harm me. But if I looked like them or was invisible, then I would be fine. Everything seemed as though it had been lit up with color and hundreds of unique people were bustling about going on with their day. This was certainly not what I was expecting from this fey town. I had heard that the town was like a wilder and more chaotic version of an elven city. It was not what I expected, however I was very impressed. The fey here seemed to have a sense of order. There were even sounds of children playing happily. What came from the stories I had heard only presented them as wild evil creatures that would never be able to build a functioning society. However now I could see with her own eyes that it wasn’t as simple as that. They were people just like anyone else. I felt ashamed that I had thought of them as trickster evil monsters that were incapable of anything else.


I followed Shiloh around since she seemed to know what she was doing. If I wanted to get out of there I needed to follow somebody who might be able to show me the way. Suddenly a little girl fell into the river and Shiloh rescued her. I myself would have helped out but I was too slow and wasn’t paying attention enough to help. The girl seemed thankful but for some reason her older brother approached us and accused Shiloh of causing the accident. At this time my invisibility spell had worn out and I was able to be seen as clear as the sun. However since I was slower and seemed less important, I was not noticed by the man. My disguise had worked. Shiloh’s did not. The older brother quickly discovered that Shiloh was not a fey but a human instead. A crowd began to form and I kept near Shiloh in case she would need my assistance. After all she was really my only companion in an entire city of possible enemies.


The crowd got closer and closer. Just as I was about to draw my weapon to fight them off, Shiloh somehow was able to summon a storm which scared enough of them away. Her mask was off though and it became clear that she was an intruder. Before things got too intense this beautiful woman named Lady Shizuka came and calmed the situation down. After Shiloh introduced herself, Shizuka spoke. Luckily the Lady was far kinder than what I was expecting and had a vulpine spirit show us the way out of that realm. I returned Shiloh’s mask to her then we traveled out of that realm. After that I headed back to the village and bought a room at the local inn. I slept there for a while then headed back out to finish my seven tasks. Perhaps I will see Shiloh again. Most likely not but it is an interesting idea. It would be nice to figure out who she really is and what she was doing there in the first place. However that can remain a mystery for another day. For now, I need my sleep!

Dear Journal, 

It has been a while since I've written in my journal. I know I need to do it more but I've been busy recently. I have been traveling around for a while now. But there has been something disturbing going on recently in the world. War has begun. These insect humanoid creatures have apparently been attacking around the edges of Canelux. Or at least that's what I have heard. I can't really describe all the proper details. Normally these insect humanoids wouldn't be such a big thing, but they are strong. Somehow they have strong enough weapons to kill a god. In fact this is what they did. Dalanesca, the goddess of death, has already been killed. She was resurrected by the goddess of life but this meant that these enemies are strong. Anything strong enough to kill a god was a fearsome opponent to say the least. I don't have any doubts that my friends back in Adeluna will be gathering their weapons to fight against the enemy. Perhaps they were already on a battlefield getting ready for the first attack. I wish I was able to fight with them. To be able to keep them safe no matter what. They were my first team and my first friends. I'm half tempted to ride all the way back to Adeluna and to join them.

But I know that isn't a good idea. Not only will I be unfocused and be constantly trying to save them, but I will also end up only focusing on them while letting the rest of the group die. Although I might be better coordinated with them, I also will be more distracted. So instead I am going to set my sights on Apoy Island. They are gathering soldiers there and anybody who can at least weild a weapon. That is where I will be going. My skill sets work best when I am on land and fighting with melee weapons rather than ranged weapons. I'll probably be put on the front lines along with all the other soldiers. I hear the island is a jungle so I don't exactly know how we will fight there. I know how to fight there but I don't know how we will organize attacks or how we will be able to find the enemy through such dense jungles. Maybe the people living there will be able to help us. After all they will want revenge at the insects for taking their homes from them. And they probably know the jungle like the back of their hand. So maybe they will help us figure out strategies and ways to defeat these oversized bugs. Since this war has started I have been thinking about battles and why we all fight. Every person has their own choices and decisions. But for so many people to be willing to put their differences aside in order to fight a common enemy, well I never really thought we would do such a thing. Of course everybody is only fighting in order to preserve themselves but still. It takes a lot of courage and determination just to pick up a weapon. Most likely this war will bring many deaths to both sides. Yet here we all are. Gathering together in order to destroy a common enemy. It makes me wonder how powerful we all could really become if we could do this without needing a common enemy. I am both scared of that thought and fascinated by it.

As for me, well I want to be able to protect my friends. But I really can't. So what reason do I have for fighting? My mother perhaps. But I don't feel as inclined to defend her as much as a I used to. Maybe my older sibling. However we are so distant towards each other we might as well be acquaintances. What am I really fighting for? I want to fight. I know this much. Yet I don't feel as though I have any good reason to. The people who I'd like to say I'm fighting to protect are going to be in danger anyway. I know that I'm not fighting for the good of the people since I know that they can fight themselves. In fact the massive gathering of people to defend their own homes proves this. Am I fighting for my own survival? Then I'd be better off working as a noble back home and not even bothering with the sword. By fighting in the actual battles, I am putting myself in more danger than if I was sitting back home organizing defenses. Why am I really doing this? Why am I riding off to a foreign island to fight with strangers against an enemy I have no desire to enact revenge against? Yet there is something in my bones that drives me forwards. It drives me to every battle in every location in order to prove something. What am I proving? What am I showing by all these fights? In complete honesty, I don't know. However I do know that nothing will stop me. I will go to the army and fight with them. I will destroy as many oversized insects as I am able to. They will not succeed in their goals to eradicate the world and I will fight. Nobody nowhere can stop me. I will fight.