The Draconis don’t die to anything but Final Death. It was one thing that my father had always driven into our heads. It might have been a fatal mistake on my sister’s part or it could have been all in the cards. Whatever it was… the madness was driven out like a curse as soon as my body turned to ash.


When the void opened up and swallowed everything, did you think the spirit plane was unaffected? To be able to see my mother and sister again would have been the wildest adventure I could have ever imagined. I suppose I miss my other siblings as well but it is the one who destroyed my beating heart who I miss the most. The one who cried doing what she had to do. The stronger of the two of us.


In my madness, I found myself almost scared deep down. The deep threaded dreams of not just being the Red Court King but also the King of the Draconis were revealed to me. I want neither but subconsciously it was another thing that the curse had fed upon. Like all Draconis males, I want power deep down. Not the power to destroy, I am afraid I am more like my loving mother in that aspect.


My mother – I have a lot to ask forgiveness for. She never deserved anything that I have done to her in recent years. She is so much stronger now than back then but I can’t help but feel ashamed of myself. It was never my intention to make my mother cry. It never my intention to make her break vow after vow to make sure that I would live. For every strength, my mother possesses she could not get the antidote to my suffering fast enough. She arrived too late. I cannot fault her for that.


I have but one person I can put all the blame into for my suffering: Cyprus Rose. It is my understanding that she is dead but sometimes I have this nagging pleading feeling in the back of my head. Cyprus is alive. I remember when my mother sent me to Arri for education purposes. I was to attend classes at the college. I was the youngest person in the room but I had so much I had to live up to. So– I had gone to my only aunt in Arri to help me. Cyprus was more than willing to help with my studying but if I had known what was in the food she was feeding me, I wouldn’t have gone at all.


I became a pawn in hurting my mother. I hurt my mother greatly. I hurt my father’s pride greatly. I think my broke my sister into pieces. All because of that woman. 


I wanted to work in silence while I traveled this plane of Revaliir but it is hard when I am the spitting image of my mother. Everyone notices. She has noticed. On this nightstand is an invitation to the courts of Arri. I imagine I’ll be punished or there will be a great welcoming. She is not letting me into her temple until she knows who I am. I’ve tried several times to reach the Sundering Gardens but… she has me locked out. I don’t blame her.


I just hope that the time away has not made her hate me. I have words from Father as well. Draconis men don’t die. We just bind our time. The void gave me life when I did not have it and father? I imagine it took it because he had one. We’ll meet again someday but for now, we share our good-byes.


I have a lot to make up for. I will have to find my sister and tell her the news of father. I will have to endure the punishment that will bring. Aaryona is not short of punishing me for making her hurt. She is too much like Father in that aspect. I do wonder what I will make of myself now that I don’t have a crown to my name. I could do anything… Perhaps I will just be a peacemaker between the families of Arri?


Perhaps… I’ll become a peacekeeper in general and spread that even most innocent of deeds can be deadly. Time will tell and since I have experienced my first death, I suppose I’m making the Draconis proud for having been strong enough to make it through.. Vampire heritage be damned.